here

 

I am here.
It seems like a full sentence.
To say “I am” is not enough because I am nothing without a “here”.
Some call it God. The “Great I am”.
But I am not God.
I am human.
And as human, “I am” has some conditions.
One of the conditions is that I am somewhere.
Even if I am buried.
And I am not somewhere else. I am here.
Always here.
Many different here, but always somew(here).
And always moving. Another condition.
A weird one, I would say, if connected to the first one.
I am here but always moving.
Can you sense it too?
But what happens if I am in a physical condition in which I cannot walk anymore?
Where the sense of movement begins?
With the legs or the arms?
Maybe it’s only the most superficial understanding of movement. Let’s go deeper.
What about the heart? Am I beating?
What about the breath? Am I breathing?
What about the eyes? Can I move them by myself?
Even if I become a robotic-relational being, will I still being a human?
Will I need keep breathing for moving a machine?
Will I need a heart? Must this heart be human or could it be from another animal? They are talking about pigs, but what about lions? Would I still be a human with a lion heart?
Ok, now it got really weird.
Let’s go back.
I am here moving. A here-and-moving being. My muscles move, but also my heart and my breath and my eyes. All muscle-related activities, I just realized it now. So I am here moving from my muscles.
But my muscles can only move because they have neurons sending them electrical information and receiving information back. There’s a never ending neuromuscular activity happening all the time here.
Tonus.
Does it stop when I got buried? I think so.
“Neuromuscular activity is gone, bury this human.”
But what about other bodily activities not directly neuromuscular? What about liquids or nails growth?
I imagine that liquids can only move interacting with muscles and veins pressure, but what about cartilage? Is cartilage growth a kind a movement, as slow as the growth of a plant?
OMG, do I do any movement related to a plant?
What about bacteria? Fungus? All this beings moving around my belly and my skin and my saliva?
All these beings part of my “I am here” that keep moving when I got buried, when do they stop?
Does the movement of this body stop?
Does it stop if I had donated my kidney to someone else?
Does it stop if I allow them to donate my heart when everything else stops?
Does it stop if I offer my body to an anatomical laboratory? With students touching me? Is there movement happening if I am passive for someone else’s movement moving my body with no neuromuscular activity?
I can go weird very quickly, did you realized that?
I am here moving towards to weirdly.
What a perfect philosophical sentence.
Or a good sense to start dancing.
Not everyone likes to move beautiful or athletic, my dear. Some go weird.
Because dance is also the sense of moving weirdly. We were supposed to walk, but then the leg go up straight to the sky and nobody understood why.
What is happening to this human that makes the “I am here” moves this weird way that I have never seen before?
What would I become if I start to move weirdly?
Can I be a different “I am”? Can I change the way that I relate to this “here”?
Only time will show. Let’s stop and see.
This dance.
Or wait for the next text.

 

now

  

“I am here moving” seems a complete sentence.
But I didn’t realize that I am here moving now, because in the next “now” I will be moving in a different “now”, and in that different “now”, I can also be somewhere else.
Time and space, my dears. We are going to the basics.
So I am here now, moving into the present moment, but when you read this text, I am not here in this now writing it to you.
We developed many technologies, and the written word made us brake this connections between time and space of being together.
I am not here in this text, and I am not now writing it to you. But now you are reading. And I am doing something else.
It’s a communication, but it’s delayed.
This now that is happening now depends on all the other "nows" that happened before.
We call it history.
My history.
Your history.
The history of this language in which we meet.
The history of all mankind connecting between each other.
We call it culture.
And this now that is happening now is also related to a lot of dreams that I had before.
I learned to look ahead.
Because staying connected to the present time is important, but if I don’t remember that time is passing, time will pass anyway.
And this ability of looking ahead gave us the possibility of plan, project and dream.
And when I dream, I am seeing the future.
Sometimes it happens weirdly. We call it déja vu.
It’s when I live something that I might have dreamed or lived before.
It’s really really weird, but it happens to the human.
Because space is not linear, and time is not as well.
That's what I’ve heard from the non-Cartesian.
We are (probably) living is a spiraled space travelling in spiraled time through the universe to a new here-and-now that we have any idea about.
The Earth travels without our consent.
Or our plans.
The Earth travels by itself.
Or by the connection with all other beings around it.
Do the planets communicate? What about the stars, the satellites, the black holes?
I’ve heard that the position of the Moon changes the waters of planet Earth.
Is it a kind of communication?
I don’t think they can be delayed as we are now. I think they have to be very connected in the present moment right here right now moving together in this spiraled space to somewhere I don’t know.
But they know.
Or they also don’t know, but as long as they are communicating to each other, they will get somewhere.
If they get somewhere and stop, it will change everything.
They might have no other plans than moving.
But I have plenty.
I want to do so many things, but I decided some time ago to move around the sense of dwelling. So that’s what I am doing now.
As dwelling is a mystery to me, I am trying to start with the basics.
“I am here moving now”.
“Now” is something I just found out today because I realized that time is passing.
And time has already passed to me, I have some history. In my history there are some years of dance classes. More than half of it.
So I have trained to have my sense of “moving” changing a lot.
It changes if I move by myself or if I am moving with other people.
It changes if it’s a planned movement or if I am improvising.
It changes depending on the state in which I am today.
I’ve heard that dance is a communication form based in body movement. But the sense of movement, the sense of body and the sense of communication can be different to each person at different moments.
As the sense of dwelling.
So I will go slowly.
And I would like to communicate it to you.
I won’t wait until it get ready.
We are going through the process
Seeing what time makes to us
While we are here moving now.

 

eat

  

This thing of being a moving being is such a trap.
I am here moving now.
Every here is different, every movement is different, and every now, you know. It is always different.
Because I am always moving.
And every movement changes everything.
– Every movement is a micro-revolution. I wrote it decades ago and it still makes so much sense.
Every movement changes everything and I am always moving.
Moving moving moving towards, moving moving nowhere, moving to the kitchen because I am hungry.
During my whole life, I will spend move time moving towards my meals than dancing.
I need to eat 4 to 5 times a day, and not every meal is quick to prepare. I need some time.
And after eating, I need to clean and to give some time to the food to go down through my stomach. Otherwise, I feel pain. I cannot eat and start to dance straight away.
I have to wait.
Did you realize how much time I spend?
Eating is still part of my “I am here moving now” because without food the movement doesn’t happen.
And the whole dance ends. The “whole-whole” dance, do you know what I mean?
There are so many people that cannot even think about dancing because they are not eating. And body is political. Hunger is political. All these private experiences we have are all political.
It’s not possible to underestimate eating.
It’s part of this dance.

​

And I can only prepare a meal where I dwell.